The Struggle

The struggle occurred on the day I decided to wear my “Born Beautiful” T-Shirt.  I snagged this T-Shirt from the Fabulous, D’Andria Champ.

I must tell you, the struggle I had with putting this T-Shirt on that day.  You see, that Tween/Teen/Early 20’s Tawanna came back.  That Tawanna that struggles with being Authentic.  That Tawanna who worries about what people will say about her making such a bold statement.  That Tawanna that worries about not being worthy.

It was just words on a shirt, right?  Would people think I was being conceited.  Would people think I thought too highly of myself?  Would people say, who does she think she is?  Never did I think they, “Yes she is beautiful.”

Why did it cause me so much anxiety?  Why did I struggle with wearing THIS shirt?  Why didn’t I feel I had the right to wear a shirt that proclaimed I was Born Beautiful?  Why did these two words cause me to pause?  Why?

I sometimes struggle with LOW SELF ESTEEM.  I know some of you reading this are probably saying, “Yeah Right”.  It’s true.  I really do.  I fight that Chick, now.  I am in control, by the Grace of God.

On this particular day, my former self kept saying, “Do you really want to wear that?’  Do you really want to make that statement to the world?  That’s kind of conceited, don’t you think?  What will people say, when they see these words across your chest.

You see, I’ve fought hard to keep this chick at bay.  She would love to tell me, I’m not beautiful.  I’m not worthy.  I will never amount to anything.  Don’t you know you are a statistic?  Why are you fighting who you were born to be?

I know why she is saying this.  If you knew my whole story; society labels me as a statistic.  Be patient my story is coming.  Until then, I will continue to fight to be Authentically Me.

On that day, I conquered that chick and I won.  I wore my shirt boldly.  I will continue to wear my shirt boldly.

I was Born Beautiful.  I am that girl God created me to be.  That girl my shirt reminds me that I am.  Born Beautiful!

Signed,

Authentically Me - Born Beautiful